Monday, May 17, 2004
ouch.i'm feeling it again.could have just cried just now.things have changed.i try very hard to be normal but it just adds on to the misery.will we still be friends 10 years later?i really wonder.i'm really afraid of the future.so much have changed in just a year.who knows what will happen 10 years later?will i still be your friend?will i still mean anything?i tried to be there for you..but i guess you dint need me.great.you have started another phase of your life and i see that you're getting along fine.i mean im happy for you of course but it seems that i dont talk as much now as compared to perhaps before.idk how you feel idk what to say.you just make me all confused.i know i care too much i'm sorry.i know i put too much hope in this friendship.not that it's over now but.sigh idk.just thought that you were very special and you still are of course.i really put too much hope in this friendship.it's not your fault it never was.i guess i just need some time.i thought i had gotten over this but i was deceiving myself.i just feel very dry now.like all the love has been taken out of me and i'm left with no more for others.will get back to normal when i get 'refuelled'.i feel so crushed up inside.dont get the wrong idea.all along i just thought of you as a special friend.that's all.i need some time.alone.
very inspiring..
''Most Important Part of the Body"
My mother used to ask me what is the most important part of the body. Through the years I would take a guess at what I thought was the correct answer. When I was younger, I thought sound was very important to us as humans, so I said, "My ears, Mommy." She said, "No. Many people are deaf. But you keep thinking about it and I will ask you again soon."
Several years passed before she asked me again. Since making my first attempt, I had contemplated the correct answer. So this time I told her, "Mommy, sight is very important to everybody, so it must be our eyes." She looked at me and told me, "You are learning fast, but the answer is not correct because there are many people who are blind."
Stumped again, I continued my quest for knowledge and over the years, Mother asked me a couple more times and always her answer was, "No. But you are getting smarter every year, my child."
Then last year, my grandpa died. Everybody was hurt. Everybody was crying. Even my father cried. I remember that especially because it was only the second time I saw him cry. My Mom looked at me when it was our turn to say our final good-bye to Grandpa. She asked me, "Do you know the most important body part yet, my dear?"
I was shocked when she asked me this now. I always thought this was a game between her and me. She saw the confusion on my face and told me, "This question is very important. But today is the day you need to learn this important lesson."
She looked down at me as only a mother can. I saw her eyes well up with tears. She said, "My dear, the most important body part is your shoulder." I asked, "Is it because it holds up my head?" She replied, "No, it is because it can hold the head of a friend or a loved one when they cry. Everybody needs a shoulder to cry on sometime in life, my dear. I only hope that you have enough love and friends that you will always have a shoulder to cry on when you need it."
Then and there I knew the most important body part is not a selfish one. It is sympathetic to the pain of others. People will forget what you said...People will forget what you did. But people will NEVER forget how you made them feel. The origination of this letter is unknown, but it brings a blessing to everyone who passes it on. Good friends are like stars...You don't always see them, but you always know they're there.
