it's been a while since the last song. will inspiration visit me tonight?
by grace alone.
10:41 pm
Wednesday, July 14, 2010
flashback.
i went back to nanyang yesterday to visit coach and mr loo. the team has shrunk significantly, at least for the girls' team. sad to say, there's only one girl left after the j2s stepped down. i guess we've never reached pit bottom before in terms of numbers. hence i felt quite sad that the number has reduced to one.
however there was also this sense of joy as i watched them train. the way the guys treated the girl, the way they went through the beastly physical motions and the way they encouraged each other. this is a far cry from the last time i stepped into the hall. there was a sombre feel to the whole atmosphere. i could hardly sniff a hint of team spirit when i was in there. in fact the air was suffocating, much to say the least. the rivalry and darting eyes. an aura of coercion and unwillingness.
i know that change is coming and though glory may not come through recognition and medals, it sure will show through the friendships built through the good and tough times. one thing that coach said remains etched in my mind as it ran on replay mode in my mind. "i don't understand why people your age choose to work during the holidays. this is the best time for you to do whatever you have always dreamed of doing." i've always known coach to be a man of wisdom but it still caught me by surprise because those words spoke to and of me.
many people envy the long 8 months of break that girls have after A's. as my friends chatter about good-paying jobs that do not kill you, i had other plans in mind. i knew i wanted to spend the time i had in pursuing dreams and to fulfill the plans i had in mind. those 8 months were supposed to be the primetime of anyone's life. to have the liberty to do anything you want. why waste it on work? because after graduation, work will be aplenty. and you'll probably be doing it till you cry stop. i had a splendid 8 months, thank God. to travel, volunteer and to appreciate life a little more. to learn to see things from various perspectives. to make new friends while building current relationships. i had the time of my life which i'll not regret.
sure, there were successes and there were failures, no doubt. but i'm thankful for the faith has been strengthened.
when i was in primary one, we had to write those cheesy compositions on what our aspirations were. at that time, i sincerely wanted to be a teacher. perhaps i was being naive and didnt know better. but that was a genuine expression. fast forward 14 years and i'm asked the same question. with much more thought put into this, i proudly reply teaching. i've dabbled with things like play specialist and other stuff like social work but at the end of the day, i know that i cannot run away from my calling. somehow, i really enjoy working with young people and living in a morally depraved generation, there in me stems the desire to educate. education definitely has more weightage than teaching. there is no other job that strikes a chord in my heart. hence just as i press on to receive the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ, the decisions i make will need to have a bearing on my calling in life which are then according to His purposes. so apprehensively, i stared at the screen for a while. thinking through repeatedly, for the one click will determine my academics and career path. after much hesitation, i clicked on that button. i had done it. english language. i had declared you as my major.
and the rest they say, is history.
be Thou my vision.
1:07 pm
Thursday, July 01, 2010
100 days of summer.
it's been a while. an exciting week starts because CTI is in town and the girls are getting really excited and enthusiastic about the upcoming programmes and happenings. met the girls at poolside yesterday and we caught some filming in action. dai yang tian and felicia chin in the upcoming swimming show i think. quite funny at how we sneek peek at the scenes and all the NGs that took place. and one of them made me take photos for her. highly embarassing. but the things i do for my students. haha. pz even waved to dai and he waved back. really. the things i do for my students.
moving on, i'm changing my major. i'll leave this to the next time.