Standing here amidst this point of definition Pushing for position as I battle opposition Am I on a mission or is it all in vain? Do you notice the difference or is it all the same? And who do I blame when my vision gets blurry I get in a hurry, frustrated and feeling fury Faith is enduring to stand the test of time Answers are plain we make them hard to define But pull from divine when problems arise But pride denies and my stand never survives In every one of our lives in every single day We need to lay down our pride as God takes it away
yesterday i was wondering what things would have been like if i chose ac a year ago. vic and i came to a conclusion that we probably wouldnt be the people we are now if we went there. my jc experience would probably not be so unique. though i really miss being in a mission school and though school may be a struggle at times, it taught me to think from many perspectives. i'll probably be too protected in a mission school environment and take things for granted. i probably wouldnt have learnt to think like a non-christian. the cultures are so different and it's something that has to be experienced. ahh i think i think too much.
You give and take away my heart will choose to say Lord blessed be Your name
10:24 pm
Saturday, January 27, 2007
pitter patter.
reached home not long ago after spending the night with vic clean josh and james. snap snap snap went the camera. haha. you guys are great fun. (: ate my fish and chips till i was quite sick of it. rahh.
the class formed some milo gang last week. went to the drinks stall, ordered like 13 cups of milo and cheered in the middle of the canteen. haha cheers to milo. played ultimate frisbee the other day. the field needs some patching man. haha it's in a bad state. oh we were watching the australian open just now on espn and sharapova got owned by williams. quite an interesting match. it got us interested.
so i look to You.
11:43 pm
Friday, January 26, 2007
sway with me.
i hope it ends here. i forgot to bring my racket home today. usually i would just leave it in school but today i wanted to bring it home but i forgot so i just left it there. the thing is, i just remembered. after like 3 hours. rahh. i dont like this feeling.
seriously, i think i need some sleep.
thank You Lord.
10:55 pm
Sunday, January 21, 2007
At the cross-Hillsong
oh Lord You've searched me You know my way even when i fail You i know You love me
Your holy presence surrounding me in every season i know You love me i know You love me
at the cross i bow my knee where Your blood was shed for me there's no greater love than this you have overcome the grave Your glory fills the highest place what can separate me now?
You tore the veil, You made a way when you said that it is done
and when the earth fades falls from my eyes You stand before me i know You love me i know You love me
His love never fails.
Your grace amazes me, so much.
5:54 pm
Saturday, January 20, 2007
ding dong dang.
school's been fun. mr tan's super nice to us. learning gp has never been so fun before. oh well. he asked all of us to choose between italy and switzerland and gave italian chocolates to those who chose italy and swiss chocs to those who chose switzerland. which teacher does that right at the start of the class? he's got an interesting life haha. we found out that he really likes to digress and talk nonsense. watched an episode of csi the other day and i almost fell asleep. thankfully he paused to ask questions. haha. mr kooi makes maths seem so easy. haha. he said if we could come up with a brand new excuse for not doing our tutorials, he'll give us a prize and not punish us. but it must be something he hasnt heard before in his 23 years of teaching. aye. the soccer guys played against some uncle club yesterday and they lost. haha the pitch's quite sad. they were like wading in mud la. poor thing. our side sub-ed all 3 goalkeepers in. yesterday was quite happening. games day was cancelled when it was abt to start because it started to rain. soccer continued in the rain. the friendly bball match against yj was postponed with everyone crowding the walkway. oh kayan taught me this cool movement during physics yesterday. the lt's the best place to get sick because everyone around is coughing. i felt like i was in a clinic.
i have the urge to learn the viola. perhaps.
if He's not made Lord of all, He's not Lord at all.
11:43 pm
Sunday, January 14, 2007i could search for all eternity long and find,
so we took our family portrait today. we all had frozen smiles at the end of the photo shoot. aye. went shopping after that. bought my chips at marks and spencer. had thai food for dinner. mummy asked me a month ago if i wanted to go for the wscs dinner next sat. i thought i would be the only one there if i went until i found out today that everyone else will be going except for me. haha. oh well.
stir it up in our hearts God, a passion for Your name.
may it be more than a song.
there is none like You.
8:13 pm
Saturday, January 13, 2007somewhere across the sea, people drown in ecstasy.
cca bazaar was on wed. the team signed up for the netball comp against the soccerettes. haha the match was exciting. then after that we played against the netballers and we won. haha. 7-2. ownage. before the game, cheng and yingxi started singing the magiclean song. you know the ad that was shown on tv like sometime ago? magiclean should consider hiring them. they make really good endorsers. haha so retarded la. they actually memorised the whole song. just that they were short of the actions. but still they were animated. haha. yingxi said she feels like she's just been released from prison because she's crazier now than in sec school. it's like she's releasing 4 years of captivated nonsense. rahh. mr lawrence's getting married. haha jinyu got the message spread within 5 mins. we were having an hour talk with him and mentioned abt him and lin lao shi. so he told us they're getting married. news spread really fast when there are girls around. or maybe guys too. oh well. my new timetable's super slack. especially with the new school timing on mondays. haha 9am man. beat that. (:
so i look to You.
4:20 pm
Sunday, January 07, 2007the silence that wonder brings and the wonder that silence brings.
i'm feeling melancholic. oh well.
school starts only at 9 every monday. woohoo. haha lessons start 15 mins later everyday but the day also ends 15 mins later. oh well.
the week was good. chosen gen is growing with the p5s who joined us today. i'm scared of them. haha. everything seemed to be linked today. a.amy's sharing of the valley of the dry bones, the sermon and the song that we sang thrice during service. making a difference. a choice is something we have, a decision is what we do with that choice. and it's not always easy. i made a decision today that i struggled with for the past weeks. it was an opportunity to serve in a different aspect and with people that i've been looking forward to work with. but i turned down the offer. today's communion was probably the quietest i ever spent in many weeks. i experienced the silence that wonder brings and the wonder that silence brings. truly amazing. at the very last moment i was still holding on to the thought of grabbing the opportunity, but at the end of the day, i know i have gained more than what i have lost.
each time i come into Your presence, i stand in wonder once again.
Your grace still amazes me.
9:08 pm
Wednesday, January 03, 2007dreams are meant to be dreamt, and fulfilled.
spent the day at alwyn's place yesterday. played table foosball with my brother and all of us watched v for vendetta. the show was thought-provoking. spent the whole day slacking, walking up and down and watching jireh try his new wheels.
i thought about my new year resolution some time ago. i wondered what would be the one resolution that i would want to keep and honour. then i found this printed on last sunday's bulletin.
another year is dawning, dear Master, let it be, in working, or in waiting, another year with Thee. another year of mercies, of faithfulness and grace; another year of gladness in the shining of Thy face. another year of progress, another year of praise, another year of proving thy presence all the days. another year of service, of witness of Thy love, another year of training for holier work above. another year is dawning, dear Master, let it be on earth, or else in heaven another year for Thee.
how apt.
2:54 pm
Tuesday, January 02, 2007sometimes what you think may not be what you get.
back from project p.o.n.g. guess it's one of the few times i can say that i'm ready for school. all the rushing for lectures and tutorials, datelines and stuff. a new year, a fresh start.
project p.o.n.g. it's been tough. i got to know more people better like the younger ones and people around me but at the same time, i also got to know more of people. the latter hasnt really been a wonderful experience as our characters and personalities unfold. but i'm thankful for this chance because i know that i would never know you people in the same way just by hanging around in church. as a committee, we shared a lot of experiences together. praying together, worshipping together, helping one another etc. when things didnt go quite right, when we didnt feel the sense of urgency, someone had to be the bad guy. personally, there were many times of disappointment. i realised we were there with different goals. the run didnt make me feel better. but i guess that it's truly by His grace that we overcome. serving is not more of doing, but rather it's more of humility. it's not easy to humble yourself before others and before Him. but at the end of the day, it just shows how big God is in our hearts. if you think He is big, then is He showing through?
watchnight dinner was packed with people. but many started to leave after that so service was quite hmm, empty. slacked outside khuen hall while the adults had some karaoke session. after service people rushed out of the sanctuary to watch the display of fireworks but it was being blocked by some tall tower. oh well. went for supper after that and i told chewy that when you're feeling down, you should drink some kickapoo because it's joy juice. mix it with coke and you can turn up the feeling of joy. but of course, that's only what it claims.
in Christ alone will i glory though i could pride myself in battles won for i've been blessed beyond measure and by His grace alone i overcome oh, i could stop and count successes like diamonds in my hand but these trophies could not equal to the grace by which i stand
claire. thanks alot for all you've done during the chalet. you've been a great help and blessing as well. i realised i havent told you about the issues i have on my mind. oh well. there'll be opportunities in the future. but seriously, thanks for always being there. (:
shaun. thanks for reminding us that we should always look to Him. thanks for helping us get our goals right. it's been great working with you. (:
john. the giant lurks. thanks for all the help you've provided. glad to see you play with much more love than before. you have great potential as a leader, but you've got to learn how not to let yourself take control, but rather always look to Him. thanks for all the experiences man. (:
fongrace. it's been a joy working with you. like what shaun said, you are really wise. all the reminders and opinions that you've given, they really helped put things right. i admire the patience you have with the younger ones. rahh. i wonder what the chalet would have been like without you. thanks grace. (:
grace cheah. the money person! how can i forget you? thanks for helping to safekeep all the money that we needed for the chalet. it's been great talking to you and of course, playing speed with you. (:
bre. thanks for the reminder that we should always be sensitive to the spirit. it's great to see you grow in the Lord and intercede for others. thanks for all the experiences, neighbour. (:
lokey. thanks for all the help man. thanks for always being there to listen. guess you're the only person who understands. thanks a lot. (:
shawn. you've grown alot. it's really nice to see the change in you and see you mature in the Lord. thanks for always helping me to clear up. really appreciate it. (:
jireh. thanks for being part of this chalet. it's been great waking up every morning to your complaints. thanks for bridging the gap. you've been a blessing to all of us. (:
jing yang. you did great as a camp commandant! never underestimate what the power of God can do. all for Him. (:
cheryl. thanks for the reminder that being able to serve Christ should put a smile on my face, no matter the circumstance.
charlene. thanks for being the joke among us. your funny antics sure help make my day. i'm glad you found God. (:
joey. thanks for helping to bring all the stuff down to the chalet. we sure needed help. (:
chris. you've matured since you started serving. thanks for all the lame comments to help brighten our day. (:
jeremy. thanks for helping whenever i needed some. you've got great potential man. glad you realised the importance of playing with love. (: