Saturday, October 30, 2004cough cough cough. bleh feel kinda sick now. having headache and a slight cough . throat feels kinda of itchy. oh well. cough cough. went for meeting this morn. found out tt i have to teach the o1s their profiency test stuff when i dont even know the answers myself. poot. toodle went for kidzone today. had fun. haha the way the kids behave and all. oh boy. then morgan played some games with them and we were all playing along too. haha havent been there for quite a while. cough cough. im quite bored now. have to play at pk tmr. oh well.
10:21 pm
Friday, October 29, 2004oh well. today's the last day of sch. went for aero-modelling course today. it was cool. learnt quite a lot in both theory and practical. practical was fun but i started to panic when the plane started going up and down so i tugged a little at the elevator and the plane crashed. oh well but the second time i did it the plane ran out of fuel and i did the nicest landing haha. bleh. wont be going korea anymore cos daddy cant make it so mummy's going hk i want to go too but it clashes with youth camp. oh well im sad but guess i'll have to give hk a miss cos youth camp's more impt. sad arh sad. boo today's a sad day cos quite a lot of people had ptm. im sad. bapok's gonna be retained. he did quite badly. oh well i've gotta work harder.
4:35 pm
Tuesday, October 26, 2004i'm sorry for getting in your way i'm sorry for always spoiling your day i really dint mean to i just feel like such a fool just what's wrong with me with you and with everything else was every cherished moment an illusion? if it's not then why do i always get kicked back into the harsh reality and taken of everything that was given? i really feel very tired wrong ideas and misunderstandings when will they cease? pleasing people is not my forte and dont always take advantage of me not knowing how to argue cos i'm not always what i seem to be whatever it is i tried to make you feel better when you were sad i tried my best to please you when you were mad i tried to understand i gave way to you but if you think that's really too much then i'm really sorry and that'a all i can say cos i think there's no point in doing anything much less a chance to i'll try to stay clear of your way but i'll still be there to help you anytime that is if you still need me
8:33 pm
Monday, October 25, 2004feel quite bad now. what's wrong. think i cared too much again. again. sigh. what's wrong. what's wrong with me. something i guess. something very wrong. sigh. it's like i think i caused quite a lot of unhappiness to people whom i care alot. or perhaps too much. sorry. really.
i tried to find a chance to talk to you. something which i have been finding the whole year. something that just dint come my way. i had two chances that night. that fateful night. but somehow it flew away without me. i had lost it. it's not that i dint see it coming. it's not that i dint cherish it. but there were unforeseen circumstances. too many. too much for me to handle. i have been bearing it all along. all alone. no one knew. no one knows. i felt really lousy. i just wanted you to be alright. i just couldnt leave you alone. i kept hoping that you will make the right decision. part of me wanted to stay put in the shelter. cos i've been thru this before. i cared too much once and it caused alot of unhappiness. i didnt want the same thing to happen again. it really crushed me. but i still went out in the rain to look for you. cos i knew that you are impt and even if i lost you i would know that at least i have tried my best. things arent the same as before. over-caring. something that wasnt said yesterday. this went thru my mind yesterday when over-righteous and over-wicked were mentioned. i'm really sorry.
*when will my reflection show who i am inside..
1:16 am
Sunday, October 24, 2004bleh. feel quite sick now. no sch tmr!!oh well john has no sch on tues instead. bleh. slept for a couple of hours just now. was too tired. sneeze. oh well still feel tired and i ache all over arh. anw still felt good after yesterday's pract and after church today. sneeze. trying to remember the happenings of the week. uh actually i can only remember happenings from friday. oh well.
friday lots of stuff happened. 99% of it is quite sad arh. shant mention. all thanks to the five-day week thingy trainings are on fri now. then after training took a cab down to east coast with melvin and ml if not by the time we reach there we can just get ready to clean up the mess. tried to catch some sleep but couldnt. oh well. yeah then lots of stuff happened during the bbq. was drenched cos it rained and all. poot.
sat had worship pract.my ear was partially blocked after the pract of chris played very loudly especially during one way. then walked to the mrt station with ade and josh. talked abt ghostly stuff along the way. haha.
today went to church with ade. church was cool. wait a minute. church is always cool. yeah boo brought the mike and ike jellybeans. john led worship in pk today. oh yeah. thanks arh ade for making my day when you spit the jellybean into my hand. haha warm and slimy.ugh.
8:26 pm
Friday, October 15, 2004tired. played bball with jess they all in the morning. my legs are aching cos me and my family went to ikea with the thot of getting a bookshelf in mind. somehow we left ikea with lots of stuff but nothing like a bookshelf. haha me and my mummy walked in front of my daddy and my bro and we had to stop often cos they walked too slow. they were appreciating the items there. so they claim. oh well haha got meeting tmr then gtg for some social etiquette course on monday haha. bloop.
11:03 pm
Thursday, October 14, 2004today's marking day. tmr too. feel tired today. going out later. right now just listening to somewhere out there by two kids called philip glasser and betsy cathcat. it's really cute the way they sing and all haha and they cant reach the high note haha go find the song yeah or you can come to my house and listen to it haha.
Somewhere out there
somewhere out there beneath the pale moonlight someone's thinking of me and loving me tonight
somewhere out there someone's saying a prayer that we'll find one another in that big somewhere out there
and even though i know how very far apart we are it helps to think we might be wishing on the same bright star and when the night wind starts to sing it lose a lullaby it helps to think we're sleeping underneath the same big sky
somewhere out there if love can see us through then we'll be together somewhere out there our dreams come through
1:14 pm
Tuesday, October 12, 2004exams are over!! bleh haha everyone from my class were so happy cos the rest of the classes have one more paper tmr when we're out playing. granduncle's here from hongkong so dad's been entertaining him his son and his wife. he's bringing them to sentosa today. oh well jerome asked me to go on sunday to play vball haha his hands are getting itchy oh well dont think i'll go. haha chem paper had this vegemite thing made me laugh. better enjoy the rest of this week before the results come back. think i'll drop to com. science cos i probably wont pass both. oh well played with reen's dog just now. it's time for play...
*what's wrong?
5:21 pm
Friday, October 08, 2004i'm stuffed. went to fish and co. for dinner tonight. ate lots of stuff daddy had a whole crab to himself. haha service there was good mm hm. went to adidas shop after dinner. bought my long-awaited pair of shoes it's quite cool then saw a yellow jacket that looks nice so bought it then my bro bought a pair of pants idk for what it's like track pants but the material is not track pants material oh well idk la even he himself dk what it's going to be used for. i suggested wearing it to sleep but it's like a waste orh original price was 89 dollars but then most of the stuff were on 50 percent discount so it's abt 45 dollars my jacket was 109 and it became 54.50 shoes were also 109 but shoes only had 30 percent so in total daddy paid 100 over bucks for our stuff haha cool wanted to get track pants but they dint have what i wanted oh well haha spent quite a lot of money tonight daddy still went to the carwash and the petrol station think record's broken previous record was we bought clothes that chalked up to 100 over bucks too but not as much as tonight haha way to go. my dad's cool.
10:27 pm
a maths was terrible today think i will only get 10 odd out of 80. whatever i studied dint come out. oh well. anw daddy's back yup tired. cant make it for diving. mummy wont let. oh well psle ends today it's time for play. not for me though still have four more papers. kinda screwed every paper. so many things going on. thoughts running thru my head. all messed up. oh well got to learn to let go. i hate liars. so stop being one.
